A cup of coffee’s not a relationship, it’s a beverage
—McGarret, Hawaii Five-O
I must say, the best part of pregnancy is knowing who father is
—Dorota on Gossip Girl to the apparently promiscuous Blair. Pearls of wisdom
Jimmy, if you don’t make a move soon, you’re gonna get stuck in the friend zone. And that is a real thing. I saw it, on Friends. Ross and Rachel were stuck in it. It made for some good episodes but poor Ross was in hell.
—Mom on Raising Hope
Trying is the first step to sucking
— Sabrina on Raising Hope. This show is chockful of life lessons. In bite-sized nuggets.
Man this place is like Battlestar Galactica. Where do you guys keep the cylons?
Photoshop, it’s plastic surgery for poor people!
Sometimes it’s just a matter of one degree, one direction or another. 211 degrees, that is hot. 212 is BOILING. And when you have water BOILING, it can power enough to power a steam engine! Do you know what I’m talking about Nigel?! YES! YOU! TWO! ARE ON THE HOT TAMALE TRAIN! WOOHOOOOOOOOOO!
-Mary Murphy, on Ashley & Chris’ Broadway
Nice and clear!
Ah, memory impairment. The free prize at the bottom of every vodka bottle.
#sheldon #bigbang #quoteoftheweek
And don’t I know it.
- Steven Tyler to Randy Jackson on American Idol. Another show I don’t watch.